rise above this

I don’t know if I am denying the feeling of self worthlessness right now, but I know that I’m feeling a bit of hurt and pain. I know that tomorrow will be a better day, and hopefully the same for the entire week. The Father said that I’ll definitely flinch more than most, (which itself is a good thing). I did so today when I was walking to church. I was proud of myself for not overreacting and thinking the worst from it, because when I turned around the man was only unpacking. The sun is staring intensely at me as it sets, if only I could have noticed its placid shine earlier… I just didn’t give myself the time to be swallowed up by its warm affection. I can’t seem to walk the streets pedophile free, and because of that I walk as fast as these feet can, paying little attention to the outside. Feeling a bit of satisfaction from what I can recollect, I did enjoy the middle of the previous week. Brooklyn made me smile so much, my face felt heavy. Thankfully for my friends who suggested walking, I got to relax with both a clean conscious and an open heart that liberated me from a particular doubt I’d had. I haven’t held a child in years, and due to that I’d considered myself incapable of taking care of children. On two separate days, I was given the task of being there for two kids that were not yet two years. Being there for them, as they walked with their soft and tiny feet… staring up at everything, involved me having to carry them when they went too far astray. The hesitation flew off in both occasions, and holding them close to me excited my kindness. The Father also gave me the reassurance that no one will take advantage of me again. I can honestly say that I believe in that, even when I just happen to walk along certain paths where creeps hang around on. For tomorrow I hope to rise above the aches I keep silent at times, to not only give off whatever can offer someone with delight… but also to except whatever good others do provide me with.